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Dumb people
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| Did you hear about the sanitation worker who got fired because he couldn't keep his mind in the gutter? |
| Jack and Jill went up the hill to have a little fun, But stupid Jill forgot the pill and now they have a son. |
| People who believe that the dead never return to life should be around at quitting time. |
| Did you hear about the guy who made a million dollars in Poland selling Cheerios as doughnut seeds? |
| How does a really dumb person kill a fish? They drown it. |
| Be careful what you wear (or don't wear), when working under your vehicle... especially in public. From the Sydney Morning Herald Australia comes this story of a central west couple who drove their car to K-Mart only to have their car break down in the parking lot. The man told his wife to carry on with the shopping while he fixed the car. The wife returned later to see a small group of people near the car. On closer inspection she saw a pair of male legs protruding from under the chassis. Although the man was in shorts, his lack of underpants turned private parts into glaringly public ones. Unable to stand the embarrassment she dutifully stepped forward and tucked everything back into place. On regaining her feet she looked across the hood and found herself staring at her husband who was standing idly by. The mechanic, however, had to have three stitches in his head. |
| The Deer Hunter A man's wife insisted on going deer hunting with him. Finally, he gave in, and set her up at the base of a tree, telling her he would scout around, scare up a deer, and send it her way. After about 15 minutes, he heard a shot. He rushed back to the stand where he had left his wife to find a man with his hands in the air saying: "OK, OK lady, it's YOUR deer! Just let me get my saddle off of him." |